Summer of Seven

August is winding down.  The kids are back to school this week.  Miranda went back to college, Morgan started, and Madi & Julia went back to high school.  Mr. "I got it dad" started first grade.

The resilience of kids never ceases to amaze me.  A little over four years ago, Habtamu could barely walk or talk, and his future seemed awfully bleak.  Today, he's a thriving, seven-year-old troublemaker.  Last in line, but first to meals.  Frequently rides the line between evil and lovey.  Can't wait to read and constantly sings pop tunes.  Never stops moving.  Eats like a professional football team.  Always leaves the lights and bathroom radio on.  Barely even waves goodbye from the bus anymore.  Is known for cheesy sayings like, "hello ladies!"  Bottom line: he's a regular old kid, and we can barely remember what the family was like before he showed up.

With bi-weekly OT, PT and speech therapy, his physical maladies are dwindling.  He can brush teeth, take a bath, and dress himself with ease.  He knows his numbers up to about 40 and all the letters of the alphabet.  Math and reading are still elusive, but he's eager to learn and try new things.  First grade is going to be a challenge for all of us.  With several different classes and homework, we'll have to stay on top of it so he doesn't get behind.  But, it'll be interesting to see if he continues to be a sponge and works his way through the year.

No matter what happens this school year, God continues to bless our family with good health, amazing friends and family, and unparalleled opportunities to see the work of his hands in our world.

An update for 2012

I'm beginning this post right now because I'm concerned about the possibility of our blog being dropped or erased due to lack of use.  I want it to stay up because reading other peoples' stories was so helpful when we first started to think about adoption.  Also, because Tommy's story is one that is so full of hope and God's blessings that it needs to be out there for others to read. 

So, over the next couple weeks, I'll have a few end-of-year posts to make sure this blog reflects what an amazing couple of years it's been since we hopped on this express bus to emotion-ville called international adoption. 

Reprint

Kinda cool, the kids and Tommy's story went nation-wide on USAToday.

Vacation

Tommy is doing incredibly well.  His vocabulary is expanding.  He comes up with something new, a phrase, an exclamation, or something just about every day.  We just got back from vacation.  We went to see 2 of the 3 sets of grandparents.  We went to the beach in Maryland, and played in a stream in Philadelphia.

Tommy got a chance to meet many of his new relatives and family friends.

In the news

Last Sunday, The Cincinnati Enquirer ran three stories about adoption; two featured Tommy and our family.  One talked about all the "stuff" going on in international adoption these days; fraud, corruption, etc.  We didn't experience ANY of that in our adoption, but I guess it's out there somewhere.  Here's the story.

One was just about us, Tommy, our family and our adoption experience.  It was part of a contrast; there was another family whose experience has been the opposite of ours.  They've been waiting 3 years for a little girl from Guatemala. Very sad.

The third story was about the International Adoption Clinic at Childrens Hospital.  They've been very nice and helpful.

Overall, we've had a great adoption experience so far.  And we're happy to bring some attention to the issue.  We're hopeful others will read these stories, understand the plight of children like Tommy, and take our lead.

First 90 Days

On July 1st Tommy will have been with us for 90 days.  In that relatively short time our family has changed quite a bit.  It's been nearly 11 years since we've had a new family member, and my memories of the time right after Morgan was born are a bit hazy.  But I imagine it was much like this.  Tommy and the rest of us are getting used to each other; our moods and personalities; our likes and dislikes; our habits and schedules.  It's a process, but overall it's going very well.  Since he joined us, we've watched Tommy adapt from an un-trusting stranger to an indispensable--and and mostly happy--part of our family.

We've settled in to a routine of sorts.  It's been fortunate for us that summer arrived not long after Tommy did.  So, the kids are all home from school and there's lots of together time throughout the day.  Tommy still wakes up very early, usually by 6:00; a hold-over from his schedule at the Care Center.  We have breakfast together most mornings; he likes Cheerios (what kid doesn't) and pancakes.  Fortunately, (as some of you know) we make pancakes from scratch every morning at our house.  Before the other kids get up, we usually have a chance to watch/listen to some of his favorite Ethiopian kids songs on Youtube.  He dances and sings, which is quite amazing since the neurologists told us he's missing the part of his brain that's typically associated with tempo and music appreciation.

He usually goes with Momma to the YMCA early in the day, and spends some time in child watch or in the gym, playing on the equipment.

We have therapy, both physical and occupational, a couple days a week with other doctor visits sprinkled in throughout the month. We're three weeks into a serial casting plan to help improve the function of Tommy's right leg and foot.  Each week, a new cast is put on in a way that stretches his tendons and muscles and moves his ankle and foot closer to the correct position for better balance and mobility. So far, it's worked great.  His first cast improved his range of motion by 30 degrees.  They told us an improvement of 7 or 8 degrees would have been good, so 30 is super!  The whole process is expected to take about 6 to 10 weeks.

We've begun the process of registering Tommy for school in the fall.  Our school district has an excellent program for kids who need PT, OT and speech therapy.  In our visits with the neurologist and therapists, they've diagnosed Tommy as having Cerebral Palsy, a result of an in utero stroke.  The CP diagnosis helps the hospital, doctors, insurance companies and school district to recognize that his condition requires some pretty extensive "work".  It helps distinguish him from other kids who may just need a little extra help in speech or mobility.  They tell us it will really matter when our insurance company reaches the limits they typically apply for therapy, then other resources become available to him via local organizations and the State.  In any case, the school is evaluating him for placement into this special program in the fall.  Preschool will be two or three days a week, and he can go to one of two close-by schools.  They'll provide his therapies there, so we won't have to take him all the way to the hospital.  That'll be a big help for Jen.  We've got appointments in August for a final determination, but it seems very likely they'll take him.

He's very smart.  We've watched in wonder as he figures things out; especially technology.  He knows how to turn on the TV, VCR and DVD players.  He's got taking pictures down to a science, whether it's with a cell phone, mobile game system, or a digital camera.  He understands the phone and skype, which we use a lot when I'm on the road, or to call Gramom and Grampop.  He knows what a computer is for, at least conceptually.  And he likes listening to the radio, or at least browsing the stations.  We've been practicing drawing circles and lines, and he's getting good at saying, although not yet distinguishing, colors.

We've been to the bus stop and back about a hundred times,

we've gone hiking and swimming, clothes shopping, rock collecting, ball playing and had a bunch of picnics.  It's been a great 3 months!

Tommy update...

by Jenny McBrien Romano on Thursday, April 21, 2011 at 4:09pm

Wow...can you believe how time flies? Tommy has been an American citizen for 3 weeks! I cannot believe how wonderfully adjusted he is. The first week and a half were really tough but we have come a long way. He throws a few fits a day and can really hold a pouty face/grudge for a while. But when he is happy he is smiling and laughing. He loves to kiss and play with his siblings. They love to read to him and put him to bed at night. Tommy has even gone to child watch a couple of hours a day so I can work in the gymnastics center at the Y. He is a very resilient boy!

Tommy has undergone a ton of testing, etc to figure out what care he needs. Found out yesterday from his MRI last week that he suffered a stroke in the lower left quadrant of his brain sometime in utero or soon after birth. It affected his ride side mobility and speech ability (no kidding!). The doc said he will be golden with speech come 1st or 2nd grade and that he may have some defecits concerning spatial awareness...His foot and hand are a whole different story. He needs serial casting for 4 weeks with Botox injections to extend his heel chord and make it so his heel can strike the ground to build muscle. His tone is low and his right leg is 3cm shorter than his left. So after the 4 wk serial casting he will need a brace to help with his gait and a lift in that shoe to level his legs. The doc insures us it will be an amazing transformation when all is done. I cannot wait. For his right hand they would like cast his left arm (working arm) like if he had broken it. The idea is to force him to use the arm that is lazy. He has some control using it but the doc said he is really just being lazy and forgetful about it.

So all in all a very good prognosis. We are very thankful and wish you all well and blessings galore! Have a wonderful Easter!